In the Beginning

(to justify God's ways to the 20th century)

#In the beginning was the computer.

: And God said: Let there be light!

#You have not signed on yet!

: God.

#Enter user password.

: Omniscient.

#Password incorrect.
Try again!

: Omnipotent.

#Password incorrect.
Try again!

: Technocrat.

#And God signed on 12:01 a.m.,
Sunday, March 1.

: Let there be light.

#Unrecognizeable command.
Try again!

: Create light.

#Done.

: Run heaven'n earth.

#And God created Day and Night.
And God saw there were 0 errors.

#And God signed off at 12:02 a.m.,
Sunday, March 1st.
Approx. Funds remaining: $92.50.


#And God signed on at 12:00 a.m.
Monday, March 2.

: Let there be firmanent in the midst of the water.

#Unrecognizeable command.
Try again!

: Create firmanent.

#Done.

: Run firmanent.

#And God divided the waters.
And God saw there were 0 errors.

#And God signed off at 12:01 a.m.,
Monday, March 2.
Approx. Funds remaining: $84.60.


#And God signed on at 12:00 a.m.,
Tuesday, March 2.

: Let the water under heaven be gathered together unto one place and let the dry land appear and

#Too many characters in string specification.
Try again!

: Create dryland.

#Done.

: Run dryland.

#And God created earth and seas.
And God saw that there were 0 errors.

#And God signed off at 12:01 a.m.,
Tuesday, March 3.
Approx. Funds remaining: $65.00.


#And God signed on at 12:00 a.m.,
Wednesday, March 4.

: Create lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night

#Unspecified type.
Try again!

: Create sunmoonstars.

#Done.

: Run heavens.

#And God create the sun, moon, stars.
And God was that there were 0 errors.

#And God signed off at 12:01 a.m.,
Wednesday, March 4.
Approx. Funds remaining $54.00.


#And God signed on at 12:00 a.m.,
Thursday, March 5.

: Create livingcreatures.

#Unspecified type.
Try again!

: Create fish.

#Done.

: Create fowl.

#Done.

: Run Fish'nfowl.

#And God create the great seamonsters and every living creatures that creepeth wherewith the waters swarmed after its kind and every winged fowl after its kind.
0 errors.

#And God signed off at 12:01 a.m.,
Thursday, March 5.
Approx. Funds remaining: $35.00.


#And God signed on at 12:00 a.m.,
Friday, March 6.

: Create cattle.

#Done.

: Create beasts.

#Done.

: Now let us make man in our image.

#Unrecognizable command.
Try again!

: Create man.

#Done.

: Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth

#Too many command operands.
Try again!

: Run multiplication.

#Execution terminated.
6 errors.

: Insert breath.

#O.K.

: Run multiplication.

#Execution terminated.
5 errors.

: Move man to Garden of Eden.

#Garden of Eden does not exist.

: Create Gard.En.

#Done.

: Move man to Gard.En.

#O.K.

: Run multiplication.

#Execution terminated.
4 errors.

: Copy woman from man.

#O.K.

: Run multiplication.

#Execution terminated.
3 errors.

: Insert woman into man.

#Illegal parameters.
Try again!

: Insert man into woman.

#O.K.

: Run multiplication.

#Execution terminated.
2 errors.

: Create desire.

#Done.

: Run desire.

#And God saw man'n'woman being fruitful and multiplying in the Gard.En.
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

: Create freewill.

#Done.

: Run freewill.

#And God saw man'nwoman being fruitful and multiplying in the Gard.En.
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

: Undo desire.

#Desire cannnot be undone once freewill is activated.
Try again!

: Destroy freewill!

#Freewill an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
Enter replacement, cancel or ask for help.

: Help!

#Desire cannot be undone once freewill is activated.
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

: Create Treeofknowledge.

#Done.

#And God saw man'nwoman being fruitful in the Gard.En.
1 errors.

: Create good'nevil.

#Done.

: Run Treeofknowledge.

#And God saw he had created shame.
Warning: Man and woman not in Gard.En.
1 errors.

: Scan Gard.En. for man'nwoman.

#Man'nwoman cannot be located.
Try again!

: Search Gard.En. for man'nwoman.

#Search failed.

: Delete shame.

#Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been created.

: Undo evil.

#Evil cannot be undone once freewill is activated.

: Destry freewill.

#Freewill an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

: Stop!

#Unspecified command.
Try again!

: Break
:Break
:Break

#Attention all users: Attention all users: Computer going down for regular day of rest and maintenance in five minutes. Please sign off.

: Create newworld.

#You have exceeded your allocated file space.
Oldworld must be destyoed before new one can be created.

: Destroy earth.

#Destroy earth: Please confirm. Please confirm.

: O.K.

#Computer Down! Computer Down!
Service will resume on Sunday, March 8, at 6:00 a.m.
You must sign off now!

#And God signed off at 11:59 p.m.,
Friday, March 6.

#And God saw that he had zero funds remaining.


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Feel free to leave a comment!
Mike Arnautov (23 December 2016)